I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I know that I'll never find Nina, not like this, but I can't stop searching anyway. She's all I can think about,and I see her everywhere, out of the corner of my eye. Her eyes, staring, begging, accusing me of abandoning her, of not trying hard enough, of giving up. I think I'm going crazy.
I dreamed once of the worst hell I could imagine. It was a nightmare city full of shadows, watching me and twisting before my very eyes. It seemed so innocent at first, but the longer I stayed there the more it twisted into nightmare shapes, horrifying monsters showing up to threaten me. Nina woke me from that hell, but now I've found myself in a new, more horrifying reality. Hazel eyes, everywhere, watching me, looking so sad and so lost.
Maybe this is what I deserve, for letting her slip through my fingers. Maybe this is how I'm doomed to spend my days, wandering hopelessly through the world, desperate to find the one thing I never can. All I know is, I want out.